My recovery was more than a physical journey; it was a testament to the power of letting go of the old to embrace the new. After my ACL surgery, I found myself in a battle not just with my body, but with the very traditions that once defined me.

So, a few months after the initial shock of my surgery, the autumn chill was setting into this old house on the outskirts of Memphis, TN, and I was feeling every weather change in my knee and the fallout from injury in every bone. 

I had dared to buck tradition, uprooted my life with a move to the “big city”, and was facing the consequences of my actions. I had left behind the comfort of a house that was paid for, walked away from teaching, and bet it all on red for myself in creating this life of my dreams.

And boy, I lived it, exactly like I wanted to. Until that injury. The shame I felt for my body bailing on me was tremendous, and the guilt of letting down others plagued my mind 24/7.

Physical therapy had been my lifeline, but once those visits ran out, it was just me, my body, and a lot of pain…and progress that once was quick and felt like constantly leveling up in a game grinded to a halt. I tried to keep pushing forward, but man, it felt like the harder I worked, the slower everything got. 

The more days went by, the more anger and rage consumed me. It wasn’t really fueling me into action with a false sense of security, as it had before. Now, it was backfiring for sure, and I couldn’t “outwork” it, no matter how hard I tried.

And fight it I did.

My hips, back, and knees were screaming at me, and I felt completely out of whack. I was out of balance in my body and my life mirrored that struggle, left to right, top to bottom. All I wanted was to get back to the gym, to train with my crew, but I was stuck, sidelined realizing that my body wasn’t made to withstand the stress I had been putting on it.

I wasn't in a great headspace.

I felt old and tired, like I was adding on to a long tradition of falling short and let everyone down. There was no doubt among myself, training partners, and coaches that I had a mind for the game, but my body said otherwise.

I’m always a student of the games I love, but at this point, watching BJJ and Muay Thai technique videos and playing endless rounds of Siege had been played out. Not that there's not always something to learn, there's just something about doing it! You know what I mean?

It’s not that I felt like there wasn’t anything left to learn, because there always is. It’s like a language. You’ll be learning it for the rest of your life once you start practicing martial arts and self-care...oftentimes brought on by necessity after living fast and hard.

Worth it!

But at the time, I felt like I needed to get back on my feet to really start to make a difference again, but I still wasn’t ready, as much as I wanted to be. There was nothing let to do, but let time heal, and see I was kinda sore at time and healing.

It felt like the very traditions I was trying to innovate on and bring into the modern era were mocking me, despite how much reverence for them I had had through the years. The "I told you so's", etc. etc.

I had to find a new way to break through walls, and for now it would have to be behind a computer screen or behind a controller.

With no more traditional recovery path to follow, I dove into streaming. It was something I'd toyed with before, but now it was my new battlefield, my way of fighting back against the boredom and isolation of recovery. 

Streaming wasn't just a way to kill time, slack off, or run away from responsibilities; it was a way to connect, to find a new purpose when I felt like my body was letting me down instead of just using it as an excuse to numb myself out and escape my current reality in an unhealthy way... and if was possible to profit from, I'd find it and see if I liked it.

But, man, doubt was always there, like this annoying little gremlin. Leaving teaching, which was the traditional path for me, felt like I was ditching part of who I was, and it felt like I had turned my back on those that had helped me traverse the traditional pathway through going to school… and I had gotten hit with a huge dose of karma, although I never did it to hurt anybody.

Yet, here I was, creating a new kind of classroom, one where I could teach by showing, by sharing the ups and downs of my recovery… and putting on as optimistic of a face as I could to hide the pain.

Then there's Tony, my cat. He instantly became the star of the show, the "Six" to my streaming setup. With him around, it was never just me; we were a team, exploring this weird, wonderful digital world together as we grew an audience that started with a couple of close friends that I played with and soon grew to much more.

If I’m lyin’, I’m dyin’ on this one…

During this season, there was a black bird that would visit Tony at our bathroom window every morning. Tony wouldn’t jump at him. It was like they were speaking to each other through a window to another world.

At the time, I had no idea what the magnitude of this omen would mean.

One day, out of the blue, a good friend of mine who was a teacher, watching from a classroom of all places, donated a hundred bucks just for keeping them entertained while they watched a study hall… ironically that was one of the things I loathed the most as a teacher.

It wasn't just for some in-game skins or to buy another game; it was like they were saying, "Hey, keep going. I believe in you." That was my sign, my crow moment, if you will. It was like the universe was telling me this new path wasn't just okay; it was right.

Another amazing thing that often gets overlooked through this era was breaking the tradition of getting “fat and out-of-shape” with an injury. I had managed to keep my physique and even drastically improve on it, keeping the weight low and as much stress off my joints as possible.

So yes, long story short, you can be well fed and completely sedentary, and still keep or create a lean, adaptable body, but I digress...

Pain has a way of taking your appetite away, but I was reinforcing the foundation of health through food. Even with the mostly sedentary lifestyle that I was forced to accept when I wasn’t actively rehabbing, I was still doing what I could to fuel my fighting spirit without “seeing red” and being blinded by the rage of circumstance.

That's really what had landed me here in the first place.

I realized streaming could be more than a hobby; it could be my lifeline. It got me up in the morning, gave me hope, and lit a fire under me. Sharing my stories and failures with people seemed frightening, at first.

Tony and I would hop in the chair, hit the “Go Live” button, and siege the day away while sharing stories to help others on their health journey. So, as scary as it was, it was helping people, and that was good enough for me.

Red, which used to scream "warning" or "danger," now felt like a calmness, grounding me, reminding me of my passion, my drive, and the guts it took to keep pushing. The main menu and theme of this season was a constant reminder to learn our lessons as best we can from tradition, because it could save you a lot of time, effort, and energy that you can then use to take things to the next level, for real.

Streaming became my new therapy, a way to channel all this energy into something good, to connect with others who might be healing or changing their lives too. It allowed me to talk and open up. 

I found out all sorts of things about myself, including discovering beliefs from my upbringing that had been holding me back the whole time.

Traditions are cool; they're like the stories of where we came from. But when they start to weigh you down or keep you stuck, sometimes you gotta listen to that inner voice, signaling it's time for a change. It's time to step out and take that risk, even if it gets you hurt. The trick is to mastery getting back up, even if you gotta move real slow.

The hustle, grind, and work hard no matter what mentality served me well, until it didn’t. 

My recovery, my streaming, it was all about learning that sometimes to heal, to grow, you've got to step away from the old ways and make your own.

You must adapt and find new ways to do the same job. That’s what Siege did at this time with the new hard breacher, Hibana, who is an alternative to Thermite, using pellets from a launcher to open precision lines of site through reinforced walls, and the intel/plant-denial specialist, Echo, whose Yokai drone disorients with a sonic blast.

It was even invisible at first, just like the ninja cat himself could be.

So, with Tony and a growing community around me, I started looking ahead. I could see myself creating online memberships for nutrition counseling and personal training, blending the old school with the new, the physical with the digital, in my own dance of recovery and renewal.

When the average person hears the word red crow, they might think of a mythical creature or a symbolic representation of danger and warning.

They may think of the boys from SAMCRO, and the motorcycle club that inspired the show, Sons of Anarchy, as well as the Clubhouse map in Rainbow Six: Siege.

When you’re someone who is a rebel by nature and you explore these concepts, you might find yourself thinking of resistance on the path, reclaiming freedom, or the sweet release of the end of the eternal struggle of life.

You might think of strength, resilience, and leadership that comes from a long line of tradition, and how it can feel like talking to a brick wall when you try to discuss new ideas with the older generations. 

You see the image of a powerful and majestic bird, representing the ability to overcome adversity and chart a new path forward to recalibrate your reality and establish a positive and thriving future.

Operation Red Crow was a season that challenged a tradition in Siege that had been established fairly quickly. Now, I know tradition is not really a popular topic among the rebels and anarchists…

But let’s dive into this topic as we explore what Operation Red Crow brought to the table.

Good Aspects of Tradition:

1. Cultural Identity: Traditions help maintain and celebrate cultural identity. They pass down customs, values, and history from one generation to another, ensuring that cultural heritage is not lost. For example, the traditional Japanese aesthetics in the Skyscraper map could symbolize the importance of preserving cultural heritage.

2. Community Bonding: Traditions often involve community gatherings, festivals, or rituals that strengthen social bonds, foster a sense of belonging, and create shared experiences. This could be reflected in how the operations of Rainbow Six Siege involve teamwork and camaraderie among players from across the world with different backgrounds.

3. Moral and Ethical Guidelines: Many traditions carry moral lessons or ethical standards that guide behavior.

4. Stability and Continuity: Traditions provide a sense of stability and continuity in an ever-changing world, offering comfort and predictability. In "Rainbow Six Siege," this could be symbolized by the enduring tactics or strategies that have been passed down through principles that persist from season to season.

Bad Aspects of Tradition:

1. Resistance to Change: Sometimes traditions can hinder progress or adaptation to new circumstances. In a narrative, this might be depicted by operators stuck in outdated tactics, unable to adapt to the new threats or technologies introduced in each season.

2. Exclusion: Traditions can be exclusive, creating barriers between different groups, especially if they are seen as superior or if they marginalize those who do not follow them. 

3. Inequality: Some traditions perpetuate gender, racial, or social inequalities by maintaining old power structures or stereotypes.

4. Stagnation: When traditions are clung to without reflection or evolution, they can lead to cultural or personal stagnation.

When you realize that your traditions are killing you slowly, it’s up to you to change. But once you go rogue, you have to be ready to fortify your path and prepare for the fight that’s coming, and you must do it quick.

However when faced with this, a lot of people may also think of the risk of financial instability when considering holistic lifestyle changes, as it may involve sacrificing a steady income, hanging with friends, or the “certainty” of a traditional career path.

They may also think of the potential isolation, alienating friends or family, and the lack of support that can come with taking a stand that might not be popular and pursuing a more unconventional lifestyle.

However, they may also think of the fear of failure and the uncertainty of the future that can accompany making drastic changes to one's way of life…even if it’s for your own good.

"I want to share a few thoughts with you about the symbolism of this season as it relates to holistic lifestyle changes, especially for those seeking to connect with stability, security, and survivability to recalibrate their reality."

Just as "Rainbow Six Siege" teaches us to respect the legacy of its operators while pushing for new tactics, I learned that traditions are valuable but must be reassessed when they hinder growth or health. My journey through recovery and streaming was about finding balance, much like the balance needed in the game between attack and defense, tradition and innovation.

Let’s dive into the symbolism and deeper meaning of “Red Crow”.

Physical transformation of your health, wealth, and relationships is a deeply spiritual pursuit, and looking at it through that lens can help you see results, faster than a well organized, last second execute onto site.

In the context of chakras, which are part of Hindu and Buddhist traditions, the color red is most closely associated with the Root Chakra:

Root Chakra:

• Location: Base of the spine, in the tailbone area.

• Color: Red.

• Associated Element: Earth.

• Symbolism:

  • Grounding and Stability: Red represents the foundation of life, connecting one to the physical world, providing a sense of security, stability, and survival instincts. It is the chakra that grounds you to the earth and to reality.

  • Basic Needs: It's linked to basic survival needs like food, shelter, and safety.

  • Physical Energy: This chakra is associated with physical vitality and the body's instinct to protect itself.

  • Emotional: Feelings of being grounded, supported, or ungrounded, insecure can be tied to this chakra.

  • Spiritual: The color red in this context symbolizes the beginning of the spiritual journey, the base from which one can ascend through the other chakras towards enlightenment.

Broader Spiritual Symbolism of Red:

• Passion and Life Force: Red is often associated with passion, energy, and life force. In many traditions, it symbolizes the intensity of life, love, and the blood that sustains us.

• Courage and Strength: The color can also represent courage, strength, and the will to survive or fight.

• Alertness and Warning: In a spiritual context, red might also signify warning, danger, or the need for alertness, similar to how it's used in the physical world for stop signs or alarms.

• Transformation: In some spiritual practices, red can symbolize the transformation from one state to another, often through the process of purification or initiation.j

Spiritually, crows are symbols rich with meaning across various cultures and belief systems. Here's an overview of some of the common spiritual interpretations:

Intelligence and Wisdom:

• Crows are often seen as symbols of intelligence, wisdom, and knowledge. Their problem-solving abilities in the natural world have led many cultures to view them as bearers of wisdom. In Native American traditions, for instance, the crow is sometimes considered a keeper of sacred law and an omen of transformation.

Transformation and Change:

• Due to their ability to adapt to various environments and their black color, which is often associated with the unknown or the void, crows symbolize transformation, change, and the transition between life and death. They are seen as messengers from the spirit world, often signaling that a significant change or transformation is coming.

Mystery and Magic:

• In many mythologies, crows are linked to magic, mystery, and the unseen. They are often associated with witchcraft in Western cultures, where they can be seen as familiars or omens. In Celtic mythology, the crow is connected to the Morrigan, a goddess of war, fate, and death, emphasizing their mystical attributes.

Death and the Afterlife:

• Crows have a strong association with death, not necessarily in a negative context but as part of the cycle of life. They are seen as psychopomps, guides for souls in the journey after death. In some cultures, seeing a crow can be an indication that one is being reminded of mortality or that someone is watching over you from the afterlife.

Trickery and Deception:

• Due to their clever nature, crows can also symbolize trickery or deception. In some Native American stories, the crow is a trickster figure, much like the coyote, teaching lessons through cunning or mischief.

Communication and Omens:

• Crows are vocal birds, and their calls are often interpreted as messages from the spirit world or as omens. The context of their appearance or the way they behave can be read to predict or warn about future events.

Understanding crows spiritually involves looking at them through the lens of the culture you're examining, as interpretations can greatly vary. However, the common thread across many cultures is the crow's association with intelligence, change, and the mysteries of life and death.

Specifically, when you look at it in Japanese folklore, like the story of the "Tengu," crows or crow-like figures can be both protective and mischievous.

1. Embrace Change while Honoring Tradition: All right dudes and dudettes, it's time to embrace the soul of your traditions and all it symbolizes. Honor it by acknowledging that it’s a powerful representation of stability, security, and survivability. When you can put your traditions together forwards, backwards, and sideways, as well as have calm conversations surrounding them, then you can recalibrate your reality and find the stability and security you crave.

2. Seek Stability: Chaos and unpredictability might look more fun, and for a short time it might be, but it's important to seek out stability in your life. This could mean creating another source of passive income with a partner or solo, finding a stable job while you carve your own path, or surrounding yourself with reliable friends and family that encourage you to be the best of yourself. It starts with the actual physical stability in your body. It gives you the drive you need to innovate your own path. Embracing stability will bring a sense of security and calm to your life, as you look to color outside the lines.

3. Focus on Survivability: As rebels, it's easy to get caught up in the thrill of living on the edge. However, it's important to prioritize survivability. This means taking steps to ensure your safety and well-being, starting with the origins of your movement, whether that's through learning self-defense techniques, practicing yoga, or creating a solid survival plan to always be prepared for the “final fight”. Prioritizing survivability will give you the peace of mind to continue pushing boundaries and challenging the status quo, even when tradition says you need to take a seat..

Here's the big takeaway for you:

No matter how dark things might seem at any give moment, you have the power of your ancestors and traditions behind you.

Do you have an obligation to agree with everything? No.

Can you really bring dishonor and shame to your ancestors? No, not unless you quit, because they made the same mistakes or had similar experiences in other areas of their lives. They made it, and it's on you to persist and pass on, whatever that legacy looks like for you.

Operation Red Crow has a lot of hidden meaning for those seeking to achieve stability and survival through adaptability while respecting tradition, allowing them to recalibrate their reality and connect with the security they crave.

Are you ready to recalibrate your reality and tap into stability, security, and survivability? 

Introducing Rogue Consciousness Core, a groundbreaking training that will help you harness your true potential through synchronicities in your life to conquer any obstacles in your way. Don't miss this opportunity to join the movement and take control of your destiny. Sign up now and become the ultimate rebel with a cause! Your future awaits.

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By they way,

If you want to know how I stayed at 142 pounds while eating 6 to 8 meals of delicious food a day while I recovered in the recliner playing video games all day, then check out The Southern Renegade Cookbook HERE!